THE EXPONENT: Volume 1, Number 2

A publication of the Triangle National Council Fraternity Strengthening Committee

Contents

• Introduction/Miscellaneous
• Brotherhood
  • Eating Together
  • Eating Together Survey
  • Pledge Father Do/Don't List
  • I Am The Ritual
• Chapter Management
  • Stepping Stones to a Successful Career
  • Crisis Situations
  • Correction
  • Rushing Parents
• National Chapter Spotlight
• Chapter Spotlight
• Spotlight on Prominent Triangles

Well, a lot has happened in my life since the first issue of the EXPONENT. I have graduated with an MBA and have had a new baby (with the tremendous amount of company that draws and the amount of getting used to it takes). Whew!! I hope you can all forgive me for being so tardy with this edition. I hope to do much better from now on.

The EXPONENT is one of the new communications tools being used by the National Chapter. Remember that the advice printed in this document is only and can only be just advice. YOU and YOUR CHAPTER must be the implementers. Be a bit introspective. Are you satisfied with the results you've been achieving? Can it be even better?

If you answered NO and YES, then you're on your way to getting an even better Triangle experience for yourself and your Brothers! Remember also that communication is a two-way street. If you have an opinion, need help, or just want to ask questions about anything, your National Chapter is here to help. Email, snail mail, or by phone you can reach us easily. We're mostly volunteers, but for the most part we'll get back to you with whatever answers or further advice we can in a short time! We're here for YOU, don't hesitate to seek us out...

I hope you enjoy this edition of the EXPONENT. Feel free to respond with comments positive or negative!Brotherhood

Eating Together

Tim Eiler minn87

Brotherhood must be the basis upon which we Triangles do anything. The place where Brotherhood is first learned and where it most rapidly develops is in the undergraduate chapter. Since that's the case, we must find ways to foster it in those places. To be sure, Brotherhood should not stop growing once alumni status is achieved, just like our general Triangle experiences should not stop, but alumni don't come into contact as much as undergraduates do so we need to focus on them first and foremost. Both undergraduates and alumni need to be "actives" and the place to start learning and doing is at the chapter.

OK, that sounds like pontificating. What it all boils down to is this. Brotherhood is learned by observing and participating. Like engineering or any other discipline, you can't fully comprehend it or do it by yourself until you practice! Does your chapter afford the Brothers there, both undergrad and alum, chances to participate in that practice? Do you get together to interact? Do you discuss things? Do you hang out together?

In my experience, by far the simplest and best place to get this kind of practice is the table. We all gotta eat so why not do it together? You can talk about politics, women, school, Triangle, or even just the weather. What it all boils down to is that Triangle is there to afford us opportunities to develop ourselves, to help develop others, and to form lifelong friendships. One of the most important areas of development is interaction with other people. Parties can help with this, but ultimately the kind of interaction you'll deal with most often in your lifetimes are the small group and one-on-one situations. That sounds like dinner to me!

If you don't interact with others, how can you get to know them? If you hermit yourself away, nuking your dinner in the microwave while you study or watch your own tv, how can you work on your Brotherhood and how can you help others develop their own? If Triangle is about friendships, but you're always in your room, then you can you get the most of your experience? Other situations are also there for you to get together with your Brothers and to show the Rushees and Pledges that Brotherhood exists in your chapter, but few happen as often as the meals.

Chapter leaders, if your chapter has a meal plan, work hard to show by example and to "cheerlead" others in your chapter to eat together and to talk together. If your chapter doesn't have a meal plan, think about ways to get everyone together for a meal several times each week. There's little better than discussion to ease some of those "clique" problems you've been having, to work out some new ideas, to ease some of the tension you might be experiencing as a chapter, and to get away from it all for a few minutes. As a last benefit, you get to develop your dining etiquette, something that is making a tremendous comeback of late.

Brotherhood is what you sold to your Rushees and it should be the underlying basis for your existence as a chapter, so use this and other ways to develop it! To paraphrase Horace Mann, the great educator, "Brotherhood (he said habits) is like a cable. We weave a strand of it every day and soon it cannot be broken."

Eating Together Survey

1. Does your chapter have a meal plan?
2. If "yes" to 1., do you have a cook, is the plan self-serve, or do you have a caterer?
3. What percentage of Brothers do you feel attend each meal in your meal plan?
4. If you don't have a meal plan, do you have the Brothers get together to eat on a regular basis?
5. If "yes" to 4, how often? If "no" to 4, why not?
6. How many Brothers have their own microwaves in their rooms in the chapter house?
7. How many Brothers have their own tv's in their rooms in the chapter house?

Pledge Father Do/Don't List

David J. Walker rose90

My apologies to Brother Walker. I lifted this from a copy of the Rose chapter's Member Development Program without his or the chapter's prior permission. Well, my boss used to say "It's easier to ask forgiveness than it is to ask permission." I hope Brother Walker and the Rose chapter will forgive me for sharing the wisdom they have collected. Since fall pledgings will be coming along soon, I thought it entirely appropriate to include this...

• DO visit your son outside of the house at least once per week.
• DO take an active part in your son's life. Know what's happening at home, with his girlfriend, etc.
• DO make sure your son knows ALL of the Brothers in and out of the house. If he doesn't know someone, introduce him.
• DO ask him how things are going with the pledge program. If he is having any problems or conflicts with the program, set up a meeting with the pledge trainer so that you can all talk about it.
• DON'T ignore any problems your son may be having with another Brother. If any such problem even seems like it may occur, take care of it BEFORE it becomes a problem.
• DO set a good example for your pledge son.
• DON'T expect your son to do your house duties for you. Show him how to perform the duties and where he can locate all supplies.
• DO ask your pledge son what he thinks about what's going on at the chapter. Know what he does and doesn't like about the chapter.
• DO know what your son thinks about the other pledges.
• DO try to get him as involved in Triangle and its activities as possible.
• DO make sure your pledge son knows as much about the chapter as you do!

I Am The Ritual

From "About Greeks", the Fall 1993 Issue, V. 6 No. 2, University of South Carolina

I am a fraternity ritual. One that you will find locked in a file in the corner of some dark office. Because I don't get used or opened up very often, I have a lot of time to think and I'd like to share with you some of my thoughts. Sometimes, I go through a real identity crisis. Who am I? What am I? Why am I? In order to know what a thing is, you must first know what it is for. You tell what a thing is for by the way it is used.

Although there are some exceptions in the way I am used, let me tell you how the majority of fraternities use me. The vast amount of my time is spent in a dark cabinet, locked up and gathering dust. About once a semester there comes a mad rush for my existence, people literally scrambling, and all of a sudden I become very important. It's really funny because many times they can't find me. They forget where I was placed and a mild panic sets in until finally they dig me out from under the stacks of constitutions, by-laws, and chapter minutes. After the panic, I am taken to a dimly lit room where a number of people are gathered. There I am presented with much feeling and serious drama. It is obviously a moment of great climax for some people, for they are seeing and hearing me for the first time. Shortly after the ceremony, I am brought back to the dark room and place in the locked file drawer and I am not seen or heard of until the end of the next semester. In this case, as a ritual, what am I? Well, as I see it, I am a perfunctory service that must be performed in order to get new members into an organization. Once the initiation is over, I'm pretty much pigeonholed until the next class is to be initiated. I'm meant to be read carefully, discussed and even argued about. Yes, in fact, I can even change. I'm really a very human document, one that was written down some time ago after a great deal of thought by one or more men, and I have been reworded, rephrased, and re-evaluated many, many times. In order to know what I'm really about, I need to be perpetually used and studied. Too often the members mention me only at initiation time and I'm really meant for much more than that.

Fraternities have done an excellent job in keeping me an esoteric document. That is, basically a secret document and therein is the much of the problem. Not only am I a secret document outside, I am a secret to most of the members as well. They really don't know or understand me because they've never really studied me. I am of very little value unless fraternity brothers come and mutually share in the experiences and the essence of my message. I am honor, courage, integrity, fidelity, courtesy and I demand self control as well as ambition and humility. I am your ritual!

Taken from The Secret Thoughts of a Ritual by Edward King.

As a note, Triangle Fraternity Order No. 4.2.2 (Fraternity Rules and Regulations) indicates that "The complete Initiation Ceremony shall be read in an active organization meeting during the first month of each school year unless an initiation is scheduled to be conducted within the first two months of the school year." When was the last time that you studied the Ritual? Do you feel like you live it every day?

Chapter Management

Stepping Stones to a Successful Career

Charlie Hackerson minn89

When a Rushee visits Triangle, one of the main messages that is expressed to him is that he can gain valuable leadership experience at Triangle through participating as an officer of the chapter. How can this possibly help him if it takes time away from his studies? Aren't officer positions synonymous with work? Does he really want to be one of the many people begging the Brother for even an hour of their time? The answers to these and other questions are important stepping stones to a successful career in the "real world" because there are many lessons that are learned at Triangle and benefits of Triangle that lead directly to a career in industry.

Interviewing. If you've managed to get a job interview, it usually means that you have the skills necessary to do the job. To differentiate yourself from the pack, you have to show that you are the kind of person who is willing to contribute at a level above the absolute minimum. Not only can you write on your resume that you held a position of responsibility, but you have a chance to discuss significant accomplishments. Most interviewers don't want to hear about an individual's responsibilities, the want instead to talk about what you have accomplished. Being an officer in Triangle gives you the ability to talk about the tasks that you set for yourself, the results you attained, and what you learned from those experiences.

Budgeting. In all but the most fortunate of work scenarios, budgets are one of the main concerns you will have to deal with. If you can't make a product for a reasonable cost, then it is not a worthwhile venture. This is one area where being an officer at Triangle is invaluable. it makes you realize that there is a finite amount of money to accomplish all of the tasks necessary. Most students spend their time desperately worrying about their personal finances, while Triangles are at least exposed to budget constraints on a "business" scale and with working with money that belongs to the organization as a whole.

Teamwork. In industry, teamwork is becoming a tangible thing. More and more, people are being recognized for their ability to work successfully within a group. At Triangle, you get to practice being in a team environment and working toward a common goal. As an officer, you have to handle tough disputes between Brothers and larger issues like divisions within the chapter. In industry, the issues are very similar, but there is more stress because there is greater competition for promotions and salary increases. Learning how to handle these difficult issues to create a productive team environment is a skill that has to be practiced and Triangle affords its members that practice.

Leadership. As an officer in Triangle, you have the chance to demonstrate true leadership because you have tangible duties that you must perform for the chapter to be successful. When you live up to your responsibilities, you see the feedback from the other Brothers in the form of respect and the other members usually strive to be successful as well (nothing breed success like success). In industry, the real leaders are recognized by their actions and re indispensable members of any team. True leaders set examples for others to follow and are a large part of any successful undertaking. At Triangle, you can start to become the kind of leader that is always in demand and leadership is one of the most important ingredients to your success.

So when you are mowing the front lawn of the chapter house, debating with the alumni over a capital investment, or knocking on a Brother's door to get him to help out with the philanthropy, don't think for a second that your efforts are for nothing. Nearly every lesson that you learn at Triangle is applicable in the "real world," so think of it as developing the good habits and necessary skills that are essential for a good career.

Crisis Situations

Jason Evans oks88

This article is about, as you can see from the title, crisis situation. "So, Jason, what constitutes a crisis," you may ask. Well, for the purposes of this article, a crisis situation is defined as any situation where a) an undesirable event has occurred and b) decisions must be mad on how to handle it. This is a fairly generic definition, but it will suit us here.

To my way of thinking, there are two aspects to crisis management. The first of these is to simply try to avoid the crisis altogether. In order to do this properly, you need to look at how you're doing things. Just look around. Is there the possibility for someone to get injured around your house or event site? Are there reasonable steps that can be taken to avoid this? If you can remove the problem situation/causes, you no longer have a crisis-in-the-making. In effect, you've avoided the crisis.

For example, let's say you're having an event at the house (for those of you without houses, please bear with me). One of the stair railings happens to be loose. Everybody in the chapter knows about it, but let's say someone who isn't familiar with the situation comes in (invited or not) and leans on the railing. It breaks, of course, and they fall and get hurt. You now have a crisis. If you would have fixed the railing beforehand, the problem situation would never have happened. Yes, things like this do happen every day.

Please note that I said REASONABLE steps. If there is an easy way to remove a potential problem, do it. If not, make sure that everyone is at least aware of the problem. The point is to be aware of your surroundings and your operations to make yourself aware of potential problems so that you can try to fix them where ever possible.

The second thing to look at in avoiding the crisis is to follow the rules. Rules are put in place for a reason and should be followed. Another example: Let's say your house has a rule against firearms being brought into the house (a good rule to have, I might add). Several Brothers, however, own guns and keep them in the house anyway. The chapter leaders know, but don't enforce the rule for whatever reasons they might have. Then someone wanders along and somehow gets injured by the gun and once again, you have a crisis. This whole event could have been easily avoided by simply following (and enforcing) the rules.

A final item in avoiding a crisis is fairly simple. USE COMMON SENSE. If something looks dangerous, it probably is. Just use your head to make sure things are done within reason.

O.K. so you've taken all the reasonable precautions to prevent a crisis. You've followed the rules, removed any unsafe/improper conditions, and you've used common sense as a rule of reasonableness. Suddenly, and without warning, a crisis comes upon you anyway. The first thing to remember is to remain calm. This can be very difficult at times, but it you are frantic, you will probably make bad decisions about how to deal with the problem. Once you have yourself under control, then deal with the problem at hand.

First find out who's in charge. If you're the President, it's probably you. If you're the social chairman at a social function and the President is not around, the responsibility will fall to you (though you should have someone try to find the President to at least let him know what's going on at some point). If you are the person in charge, take charge. Handle the problem. If you aren't in charge, defer to the leader and do what you can to help resolve the situation. When questions are asked (and it is inevitable that they will be asked by internal and sometimes external people), the person in charge should handle them. Don't avoid questions, simply direct the querying person to the designated spokesman. You should have a plan in place for how to deal with potentially negative attention from the news media and others in certain cases. Don't forget that the National Chapter can aid you in your quest to set up such a plan and is willing to offer advice in this area on a real time basis also!

If the duty of spokesperson falls to you, keep a couple of things in mind. First, never lie (I think you know why). If you don't know something or just aren't ready to divulge information, simply state this. If you make something up, it will come back to bite you later. A second thing to do is, if possible, to try to have your thoughts and/or statements prepared before you begin talking. People outside the situation will ask questions. If you've taken the time to anticipate their questions and to think out your answers in advance, you'll be better prepared and more credible in handling the situation...likely yielding better chances of success in resolving the problem.

If you can keep these things in mind, when a crisis occurs (and one will no matter how hard you try to avoid it), you will be better able to deal with it effectively and can avoid further complicating the situation. Everybody will come out of the experience in the best way possible.

Correction

In the last issue of the EXPONENT, I wrote an article about the IRS form 990. Since then, it has been brought to my attention that some chapters are not required to file (please contact the National Office if you are not sure what your chapter's status is...don't just assume that you aren't required if you don't know!). There is an income threshold and if your chapter is below it, you aren't required to file this form. However, even if your chapter doesn't have to file, it is still a good idea to keep the records as I described them. For one thing, you'll be able to better track revenues and expenses and for another, you'll be prepared when you grow your chapter to a point where filing is required. Thanks! Jason Evans oks88

Rushing Parents

Tim Eiler minn87

When I was thinking of joining Triangle, my parents just about had a cow. "Join a frat? No way we'll let you do that! You'll never study and you'll fail out of college." In lots of informal surveys of parents, Rushees, Pledge members, and Brothers, I've found that my parents weren't abnormal so this attitude is a hurdle that all of your chapters will be facing and should address. After all, parents often control the college purse strings and a generally a big influence on their kids!

So, what are the biggest negative beliefs you'll be facing and need to combat?

• Lack of study/poor study atmosphere
• Too expensive
• Too much use of alcohol and drugs
• Too much emphasis on getting sex
• Unclean, unhealthy facility
• Cramped rooms
• Lack of etiquette/manners
• Too much disreputable behavior (partying, noisy, property damage, etc.)
• Hazing/dangerous treatment of new members

The first method to use is EXAMPLE. Live a positive, Brotherly experience every day and it will show to others. A good reputation is only a by-product of good living. When parents meet you, you won't seem phony, you won't have to embellish your story, and best of all, your attitudes will help you in your effort to RUSH these people. If you have better grades, are better friends, have better leadership abilities, can communicate better, etc. than they expect from you, it will show and they will be more likely to listen to you and to support their son's choice to join.

The second method is people. Since people believe ideas and concepts presented to them by their relative peers, especially when those peers have little or nothing to gain by the presentation. What does this mean to you? Use your parents to Rush other parents. If your parents understand Triangle and see that it has been a positive experience for you, they will likely be happy to attend Rush event, write Rush letters, make phone calls, etc. If you have a parents club, get them involved. Don't be afraid to send parents' testimonial letters out in Rush follow-up mailings.

Parents also generally have a hard time saying no to an honestly enthusiastic kid, so also make the Rushee feel really excited about joining. Make him comfortable from the first moment you meet him. Do nothing to him that would justify what the stereotypes say. Do everything in a strong, positive way! Make him feel like he's already a part of the group.

Parents will believe a university official before they'll believe you. If you have convinced people at your school that Triangle is a benefit to its members, then you should have no trouble getting someone to write a testimonial letter for you and maybe even to come to a Rush event or two. Triangle should be always striving to help the university achieve its mission and goals and if we do, the result will be a solid symbiotic relationship.

When you meet parents for the first time, it's a wise idea to meet with them in a neutral place like a picnic or a restaurant. This will help them feel less threatened and intimidated and therefore help them be more receptive to you, Triangle, and your ideas. Once you've put them more at ease, invite them to the chapter house at some point. Since you all maintain clean chapter facilities, you shouldn't even mind if they want to make an impromptu visit!

Once you get them to the chapter house, show off your up-to-date computer facilities, your study areas, kitchen and dining facilities, AND your socializing facilities. Discuss fees with them honestly and show them what they will get for their money. Remember that you are striving to show these people that your chapter is a home away from home and that you strive to provide a clean atmosphere where their son will develop himself academically, professionally, and socially. Carry yourselves well and you'll be able to do this. Anticipate the concerns and make plans on how to overcome them and you will overcome them a majority of the time.

National Chapter Spotlight We hope you are getting ready for Convention! It will be a lot of fun and it is where you get to govern Triangle, YOUR fraternity! There will be opportunities for learning, for governing, and for socializing. ...Looking forward to seeing you all there...

Chapter Spotlight This section will highlight one of our chapters...as written by them! You'll get to hear some of what they think makes them successful and what they are doing. If you'd like your chapter to be spotlighted here, for general success or to show your Brothers something about one or two successful things you have done or are doing, submit a short (1-2 page) article to me NO LATER THAN 8/10/95. We are run as a federation of chapters and can only be successful if we exchange ideas and information with each other! If you are proud of your chapter and if you are proud of Triangle, then show us why!

Spotlight on Prominent Triangles I don't know about you, but I am very impressed by some of our notable alumni! This section will give you a chance to "meet" one for each edition (assuming I can find someone to interview them!) Look for other alumni news here, too.

That covers it for the second edition of the EXPONENT. I hope that you enjoyed it and found it useful. If you did, pass the word to others. If they'd like to subscribe, all they need to do is send me email! As always, if you have suggestions for improvement or would like to volunteer, contact me or the National Office.

Tim Eiler
Triangle Fraternity National Councilman

Relentless Pursuit of EXCELLENCE!!!!