Triangle - 1999 September

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1999 September

THE EXPONENT: Volume 99, Number 5

"Our goal is simple -- You achieving yours."

The highest reward for a man's toil is not what he gets for it, but what he becomes by it. -- John Ruskin

YOU to the power of US.

That's the new year's tag line for the Exponent. Euphemistically speaking, it describes the Exponent not only in mathematical terms, but also in terms of the power we create for each other in Triangle. We each working alone can't achieve as much for ourselves, our Fraternity, our country, or our world, as we can working together. Thus, the real power in Triangle, our Fraternity, is that we add the value, effort, and attitude of each other into a power that is greater than it's sum of parts. The best part of such power is that it can be used by each of us to become better and better at the same time as it is used by the organization. Both are inherently desirable outcomes.

This effect is, however, a two-edged sword. At the same time as we can each ADD to the equation of all of us, we can each also DETRACT from that overall equation of our Fraternity. It is in the belief that each of us will strive to ADD to it, however, that the Exponent exists. This tool is presented to each of you so that you may find ever-improving ways of continuing to add to the power equation we call Triangle Fraternity.

Contents

In the Company of Leaders

The June 1999 edition of Fast Company featured an article introducing the Company of Leaders approach to grassroots leadership. This model stresses the need to have leaders at all levels and in all functions of the organization; focuses on the need for learning, listening, coaching, and experimenting; and emphasizes the need for leaders who can network with other leaders - so that they can create more leaders.

What follows are the 12 instructions that were provided.

LEADERS ARE BOTH CONFIDENT AND MODEST. Sure, you need a healthy ego to lead--but you also need to be strong enough to check it at the door. Being a leader is not about making yourself more powerful. It's about making the people around you more powerful.
LEADERS ARE AUTHENTIC. You earn the trust and respect of the people you work with when you know who you are--an when you walk your talk. Who believes in leaders who don't believe in themselves?
LEADERS ARE LISTENERS. And great listening is fueled by curiosity. It's hard to be a great listener if you're not curious about other people. What's the enemy of curiosity. Grandiosity--the belief that you have all the answers.
LEADERS ARE GOOD AT GIVING ENCOURAGEMENT, AND THEY ARE NEVER SATISFIED. Leaders are always raising the stakes of the game for themselves and for their people. That means that they're always testing and building both courage and stamina throughout the organization.
LEADERS MAKE UNEXPECTED CONNECTIONS. They organize and lead conversations among people who don't normally interact with each other, and they see the kinds of patterns that allow for small innovations and breakthrough ideas.
LEADERS PROVIDE DIRECTION. But that's different from providing answers. No single leader is smart enough to know everything about where markets are going, how technology is changing, what competitors are plotting. But smart leaders do know to pose revealing questions. Important reminder: You're not in control, and you're not really in charge--but you are in touch, and you are out front.
LEADERS PROTECT THEIR PEOPLE FROM DANGER--AND EXPOSE THEM TO REALITY. The dirty little secret of life in organizations: Most people want leaders to insulate them from change, rather than mobilize them to face it. That's why leadership is so dangerous.
LEADERS MAKE CHANGE--AND STAND FOR VALUES THAT DON'T CHANGE. One job of a leader is to help people identify what habits and assumptions must be changed for the company to prosper--and to ask, "Which values and operations are so central to our core that if we lose them, we lose ourselves?"
LEADERS LEAD BY EXAMPLE. They use small gestures to send big messages. Leaders have a fundamental obligation to live their lives according to the principles they espouse. Remember: You are always under a microscope.
LEADERS DON'T BLAME--THEY LEARN. Even the smartest businesspeople around make mistakes. Remember when Bill Gates decided that the Internet wouldn't have a big impact on Microsoft's business? These days, the right mind-set is an experimental mind-set: Try, fail, learn, and try again.
LEADERS LOOK FOR AND NETWORK WITH OTHER LEADERS. Want to make yourself even more effective as a leader? Want to heighten your influence and deepen your impact? Stop playing the role of the Lone Ranger! Look for allies, network with like-minded colleagues--and help those people to become better leaders. Remember: It's lonely at the top only if you place yourself on a pedestal.
THE JOB OF THE LEADER: MAKE MORE LEADERS. After you use this kit to make yourself a leader, look around your organization. Do you see enough leaders at all levels to keep you company changing and charging into the future? Remember: The team with the most and best leaders wins! Your ultimate task is not just to be a leader--it's to make more leaders.

Triangle Fraternity Convention 1999: Tim Eiler minn87

For those who missed this opportunity for fun, friendship, governance, and learning, you missed one helluva good time. The Triangle staff at the National Headquarters (Al Evon, Dave Fleischhacker, Dan Guido, Rhonda Halcomb, and Lynne Foster) did just a tremendous job in organizing this event for all of us. Please thank them for a job well done! The convention legislation sessions went smoothly, the learning opportunities were very applicable and well-done (thanks to all the presenters). To top it all off, many of the Brothers, their families, and significant others went on a tour of a power plant and to Universal Studios Islands of Adventure theme park. Everyone reports having a great time.

Next year, being an even year, the National Chapter meeting will be a Leadership School with no convention. It will be held at Iowa State University in Ames, Iowa and will, I'm sure, be as much fun as all the others! The only difference is that we'll have to be careful not to lose anyone amongst the cornstalks. :-)

Note that copies of the materials presented during the Herbert Scobie Leadership School are now available on the Triangle web site for you to revisit.

I remember...: by Tim Eiler minn87

Speaking of the Herb Scobie Leadership School, Brother Herb Scobie minn32 entered chapter eternal on August 24, 1999. I am saddened that I never created an opportunity to meet Herb, but he was an inspiration to me nonetheless. He was a shining example of all that Triangle wants in a Brother. He gave to his Brothers over many years - serving as Review Editor and Executive Director - and was well-known among Triangles over the last 30-40 years. He will be missed, but has taken a place at the top of the annals of our Fraternity.

As a young new member, I was impressed by all that men of my own chapter had done in Triangle. There were three Past National Presidents (Gordy Erstad minn41, Richard Sudheimer minn56 - also a Service Key awardee, an NIC silver medal winner, and currently serving on the board of directors of the Triangle Fraternity Education Foundation, and Ikel Benson minn25 - another Service Key recipient), two more National Councilmen (John Schlenk minn22 - a chapter founder and Triangle Service Key recipient, Rolland Stoebe minn27) and an Executive Director and Review Editor (Herb Scobie minn32 - also a recipient of the Service Key). That inspired me. That inspiration has been a deciding factor for me to become the fourth Triangle National President from Minnesota. I considered it a part of my duty as a Brother in this Fraternity to go beyond my college years, recognizing that Triangle is for a lifetime and that I needed to pay that more than lip service. Brothers like Herb, while I may not have personally known him (thankfully I did take the opportunity to let him know that he had been an inspiration to me, though) also serve as a reminder to me of not only my duty to others, but also of my duty to myself. I see that they took great pains to be men of high character and stability, as well as great friends. This is evidenced by the great many comments that Brothers give in reference to them. Finally, Herb seemed to see that his actions had consequences beyond his own life. From what I can tell, he recognized that Triangle relied upon him, as it does all of us, to be the best men we could be. The posterity of Triangle needed, and continues to need, men like Herb. I want to take this opportunity to thank Herb publicly for all that he did for Triangle. He'll be missed by many, but we'll continue to savor the results of his life for an eternity.

Seeing Through The Haze: Mary Luck Barr; excerpted from an article in Alpha Gamma Delta Quarterly Magazine, Winter 1996

Hazing - the shattering of dignity, bizarre tragedies and legal headaches - continues to be a dark cloud that shrouds the Greek community. Without the winds of change to turn this unsettling climate, the forecast is bleak for Greeks.

Hazing can take many forms from subtle to fatal. Hazing has only negative results from resentments to pain to wrongful death. In any form, hazing hurts the level of trust and the balance of the chapter dynamic as well as an individual's health and well-being. I also hurts the national/international organization and brings the Greek system down to its "animal" stereotypes.

One broad definition of hazing is any action, word, activity, or attitude which does not contribute to the positive development of a person; which inflicts or intends to cause physical or mental harm or anxieties; which may demean, degrade, or disgrace any person regardless of intent or consent.

Hazing continues to be a problem on campuses and many undergraduate and alumni members believe it is justified, that it is a natural rite of passage and even that pledges expect it. These members acknowledge that some activities constitute hazing yet few believe that hazing is a problem. Many feel it is an unwritten tradition - that's the painful irony of hazing.

Fraternities were formed and continue to exist on founding principles of developing meaningful, lifelong friendships, and fostering personal growth. Basic fraternity standards are inconsistent with the mental and physical abuses of hazing. Yet the recklessness still exists.

Psychological hazing has also taken its toll. Pledges have been emotionally distressed to the point of speech impediments after they were told they had failed fraudulent "national examinations." Minimizing one's self-esteem can develop into other problems like eating disorders or substance abuse.

The increased number of hazing-related deaths and accidents has brought Greeks under serious university and public scrutiny. Since Greek groups are now perceived as contradictory to their founding principles, some people are questioning why fraternities continue to exist. The time is long overdue to give a hard look to all activities and attitudes. It's time to take hazing out of the shadows and see it for what it is. It's time to think critically and independently. Without renewed commitment to fraternity standards, the place of Greeks on campus may soon be relinquished.

WHAT IS HAZING? It is an abuse that can be verbal, physical, and/or mental. Hazing can be as violent as a paddle strike or as subtle as an inappropriate word or tone of voice.

Subtle hazing may be harder to identify and detect than physical hazing. These are actions against accepted standards of conduct, behavior and good taste which may result in ridicule, humiliation, or embarrassment. Examples of subtle hazing include duties assigned only to new members, scaring tactics about what may happen at initiation, demerits, and scavenger hunts.

Some alumni may think, "What is the harm of a scavenger hunt?" Most hazing tragedies are accidents, when "harmless" got out of hand. Strong support from alumni is needed to provide better ways to build member self-esteem, confidence, and leadership. There are countless creative and responsible activities that can be held just for the fun of it, many of which appear elsewhere in this article. The result will be a strong Brotherhood without any possibility of lessening a young person's self-esteem.

Harassment Hazing causes mental anguish or physical discomfort to a member through activities or attitudes which confuse, frustrate or cause undue stress. Harassment hazing includes verbal abuse, raising voices, degrading nicknames, "tuck-ins," questions under pressure, requiring new members to wear foolish attire or to perform stunts or requiring new members to perform personal service to initiated members.

Dangerous hazing can endanger the life, health, or safety of not only the new members but of the initiated members as well. Dangerous hazing is any action or activity which has the potential to cause bodily injury or permanent psychological damage. Beyond violent abuse, dangerous hazing can take the form of blindfolding, restricting bodily movements, "kidnapping," required eating or drinking or consumption of alcohol.

Just because you weren't "there" doesn't mean that you cannot be held responsible for a hazing act. If you know or should have known that the act had the potential of occurring, you may be liable both criminally and civilly. This means any advisor, housemother, parent, undergraduate, alumnus or other person connected to the chapter can be held liable.

Before an event, ask yourself: Is the activity illustrative of the fraternity's purpose and principles? Is it educational? Does it increase respect for the fraternity? Can new members participate in equality with initiated members? Would you be willing to allow parents to witness this activity? The university president? A judge? Would you be able to defend the activity in a court of law?

WHERE DOES HAZING COME FROM? Many people try to use euphemisms for hazing: It's been called a rite of passage, a "tradition," a ceremony of acceptance, and "paying one's dues." These faulty labels make it no more acceptable.

Outside just the Greek system, the world contains many examples of hazing; in other organizations, in professional societies, in the workplace. The world is changing, however. Harassment and degradation are not being tolerated because individuals are learning they are protected by the law. This same understanding must filter down to our chapters.

WHY IS HAZING DONE? The big question is "Why? Why would "Brothers" subject other "Brothers" to mental and physical abuse?" Hazing incidents in fraternities often relate back to one of these faulty main ideas: that pledges have to "prove" that they want to be members; that pledges need to stick together to "get through" the pledge experience; or that anxiety produced during the pledge term somehow builds character.

With the social climate today of students who are more tuned in to individual rights, freedoms, and personal welfare, why would intelligent men put up with hazing?

The sense of belonging is powerful. It is a basic emotional need to have the contact, reinforcement, and affection of others. As young people enter college, they begin to search for independence and interdependence upon peers and reference groups. Research has shown that Greek undergraduate members have a tendency to lack emotional independence - they have yet to overcome the need for constant reassurance, affection, or approval. It is this lack of independent thinking coupled with a strong desire to belong that opens the door to hazing tolerance. It is the emotionally independent person who has conquered this need for constant reassurance.

Sound critical thinking can deteriorate in some group settings, resulting in "Groupthink," which is a mode of thinking that people engage in when joined together as a group where they can find justification in decision making that they would probably consider wrong individually. Group pressures can result in disintegrated moral judgment and poor decisions. It is important to be aware of these factors and that they are present in a fraternity setting.

There are other conditions that facilitate the occurrence of groupthink which are significant in the context ofGreek life. A primary factor is a highly cohesive group. As noted by Irving Janis, the man who named groupthink, "the more amiability and esprit de corps among the members of an in-group, the greater the danger that independent critical thinking will be replaced by groupthink." Other conditions for groupthink include a shared illusion of consensus and pressure on any member who expresses strong arguments against the group.

A further cause of hazing is the premise of "pledge class unity," which is unhealthy and damaging because it ensures that members will not integrate with the rest of the chapter during their undergraduate career, not benefiting from learning and growing with both younger and older members. "Chapters who have a problem with cliques or academic class separation are usually vehement about holding onto the "pledge class unity" idea.

UNDERGRADUATES. Members should not feel defenseless. "Brothers" should not be victims to acts of hazing, however innocent it seems. Any knowledge of hazing activities should be reported immediately to the chapter president, chapter advisor, National Office Staff, or other responsible party. "It is much better to address an activity immediately rather than allowing the activity to grow and potential harm to occur, " says Member Development Committee member Kimberly Pierce-Boggs.

ALUMNI. "Alumni can be of tremendous help to our campaign by updating themselves on hazing and by refraining from encouraging undergraduates to haze the 'way we did it in the good old days,'" says Kimberly. Due to the current social climate, many such fraternity "traditions" have fortunately fallen to the wayside. "Alumni need to be aware that times and tolerances have changed since they were in college," she adds.

Some university administrators say it's difficult overcoming the pro-hazing influence of alumni. A study comparing attitudes of alumni and undergraduate fraternity men revealed that alumni were more accepting of hazing that the undergraduates. Reasons offered included that older alumni were desensitized and that the prevailing social climate when alumni were on campus gave way to hazing being a more "expected" activity. The study suggested that this generation gap is probably an important factor - alumni may be adding more to the continuance of hazing than to its discontinuance.

Many who have analyzed the problem of fraternity hazing feel a key reform is to involve alumni more closely in the affairs of the undergraduates. Alumni who are supportive of fraternity efforts are positive role models. Alumni can also exhibit lifetime commitment to the Fraternity and its standards.

UNIVERSITIES. Faced with public relations nightmares, negative press, and continual hazing allegations, some universities would just as soon abolish fraternities and sororities altogether on their campuses - and some have. Other institutions have tried to work with their Greek systems to solve Greek problems. Some have established responsibility and accountability criteria for the Greek organizations to maintain recognition and continue to be welcome on the campus. Many institutions provide educational programming to raise students' awareness of hazing through their Student Affairs departments.

"I don't understand - you rush really hard, you really want these men to join and then once you get them you don't treat them very well?," asks Ohio State University Greek Advisor Tracy Stuck. Tracy reports that although the reported incidents of hazing have skyrocketed, she feels education is starting to pay off. Her university's anti-hazing efforts include educational speakers, a Greek-wide program for all new member educators, and a bid card that includes the university's policy about hazing.

Pledges/new members are the most valuable members we have," says Patricia Floren," because they ensure that we have a future." The time of pledgeship should be a time to inspire new members.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Triangle Fraternity has a very strong policy against the hazing of new members. Please check with your chapter president, that National HQ, and/or on Triangle's Website for the specifics of the policy. Hazing will not be tolerated by Brothers in Triangle. Our precepts very clearly do not support it.

Tim Eiler minn87
Triangle Fraternity National Council Past President
Engineering Project Manager - Digi International Former U.S. Astronaut Technical Educator
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